Happening or Not?

How does it feel to finish my Undergraduate? Honestly, 2020 has making life less deterministic. Covid-19 really killed certain plans. Many plans to be precise; and the most heartbreaking is when we (classmates) sadly can’t accomplish our Global Classroom in Kuala Malaysia because (drum roll) Covid. I’m not sure when will I be able to get over it. Studying overseas is like a dream since 16, and here I am being 30+. So, Covid-19, I’ll remember you. I have not received my final semester’s results yet, but I hope it will bring me to smile.

I still remembered being in April, last millennium that I was shocked, mad and sad in the same time. I did not get peace until I was saved in such a way to be able to move out from the dark. Felt betrayed, as imperfect I was in that year, I still manage to hit the right things and delivered all the tasks given. Applied Singapore’s teach less and learn more through direct, precise and provide innovative learning experiences opportunity; stabilise and managed data, record and reported data and managed events like programs and PDs. If only the outsiders could see what happened the later year and those who seated but still received thumbs up. Being responsible; I prioritised work even when I have another life being a night student. Still can’t believe it, while others and lies still be trusted than a genuine honest despair cry. Nepotism and cronyism is a scary thing. I won’t forget nor forgive as tears already dropped and dried. By the end of the year, I was not the only one who was lucky enough to leave the premises. Felt sorry to those who also wish not to stay but fall short on valid reasons to transfer. Still I felt being wrongful, so I leave it for the judgement day to be fair. Not my lost, theirs. What I got was sadness, depression and really weaken my night study and results. Thank you very much for the hardship, I pray them in return. Touché. Pretentious, unworthiness will someday doom the organisation in a long run. People’s respect, fairness and happiness are few things should not be taken lightly by leaders in any levels.

April today is different. I feel matured and careful. It feels very different as oppose to be teaching. I’m learning a lot. I want to do my best, then again there’s still a lot to learn. I’m a fast learner (in some areas) but truthfully my ego fallen a bit. I’m thankful and I really don’t want to disappoint too. So, I’ll always try my very best for the given tasks. Wait the minute, I’ve been always doing my very best in my years of working. I always care and delivered. Having said that, I still want to be better. Thinking to pursue getting the Officer position. Hey, I’m not begging for the reason to get a higher salary to buy more kpop kdrama merchandises; but I really want to be qualified to take the public service’s General Orders and Financial Regulation. I genuinely feel in my current position, it is important, appropriate to acquire the knowledge. Administration and management can be very interesting.

Apart from that ambition, I want to further my education. Just to continue the possibility to become an academic in a local or overseas university. I’m still surveying and researching which overseas university that can give me the sense of pleasure. I need to get back to my education root and concrete it. To devote in the area of Education; to improve it and help people, teachers and students more is still the goal. If money wasn’t an issue, would love to be in Singapore to study (waving at NIE). However, being in Malaysia will give me a sense of comfort more. If end up studying in Seoul, well that will be crazy and awesome!! Now, where can I get 50-60K worth of money to make it happen.

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